It is uncomfortable to suck at something. The fear of embarrassing yourself because you look bad trying something new or expanding on a skill you already have is often the reason many people get stuck at mediocre and never elevate to elite.
On the GameChange YouTube podcast show, The Conversation, a group of college athletes was asked for their thoughts on getting out of their comfort zone. Long Beach State volleyball player DiAeris McRaven explained his philosophy on trying new things. “I feel like I’ve always wanted to regret doing something rather than regret not doing something.”
It is interesting that McRaven framed trying new things around the idea of regret. He acknowledged that there might be regret in trying to do something, but, for him, the regret of not trying something new was even greater. He explained, “You never know what you might end up liking to do. I might meet new people, have these new experiences I might not have had before, so… I try my best to get out of my comfort zone.”
An unwillingness to risk the negative feelings of trying something that you might regret is a feeling that is often associated with people who have a fixed mindset. These folks are ok with the status quo and have no interest in expanding their horizons if it requires the risk of failing. A common trait of successful people, who are at the top of their fields, is having a growth mindset where those failures are viewed as learning lessons in the strive to get better.
Another interesting example that the athletes on the podcast believed to exhibit stepping out of your comfort zone was the willingness to have uncomfortable conversations with teammates when issues arise on the team. USC basketball player Talia von Oelhoffen explained that this is not easy for a lot of people, but it is often required for a team to have a winning culture. She said, “I feel like I was so non-confrontational at first, but then having a losing season and just realizing if we want to change things or if we want to win games, these conversations need to be had or things need to be addressed. And that was the biggest turning point, I think, in my career and my team’s success.”
Calling out teammates when their behavior is not conducive to a winning culture is a difficult thing to do, and when not done properly, it can make things worse. Penn State wide receiver Kyron Hudson acknowledged the sensitivity of these conversations. “You’re going to have uncomfortable situations, but it’s about how you make it comfortable.”
So, how do you make it comfortable? Hudson believes a team leader needs to realize that each of their teammates is different, and so the approach of how to talk to them must be different for each player. McRaven agreed. “Yeah, I think it’s definitely knowing your personnel… and how to speak with them. You’ll have one guy that needs positive encouragement, and you might have another person that needs a little bit more fire, a little bit more aggression to kind of wake them up a little bit.”
Bringing it up to my teammates, certain things that shouldn’t be happening, and kind of finding those ways and how to tell ’em there are people on your teams that you’re going to need to explain it differently. And so trying to find those ways is very important.
