It’s no secret that performing with confidence is massively important in sports, academics, career, and every aspect of your life. But what do you do when you lose your confidence?
Dr. Michael Brown, an executive life coach who works with the Michigan State and Bowling Green athletic departments, joined the GameChange YouTube podcast Thru the Tunnel, where he provided some simple choices you can make to regain lost confidence.
As we think about confidence, we usually can envision certain people who are associated with being confident or with lacking it, but surprisingly, Dr. Brown disagrees. He said, “There’s no such thing as ‘Oh, I’m confident, or not confident.’ Because…It’s all about progress. We’re all evolving. There’s going to be times when we’re not feeling the confidence.”
Dr. Brown’s point is that we all experience times when we feel more confident and others when we feel less so. Even the most confident people go through periods when confidence gets lost. So, what does he counsel for those challenging times?
Dr. Brown believes that even during times when our confidence has slipped away, there are choices that we can make in how we conduct ourselves. He stated, “I can still choose courage. I can still choose optimism. I can choose faith. I can still choose to be tenacious. The ability to say, ‘It’s been a hard season, you know what, but I’m going to stay right here. I’m all in. It’s been hard, but I’m choosing to stay here because that was the commitment I made.’”
In an era of instant gratification, sticking to commitments is an attribute that is becoming increasingly rare. This has become especially true for many student-athletes. Not getting playing time? No problem, I’ll transfer. There are times in life when making a pivot is the smart thing to do, but if you find yourself quitting every time things get challenging, you are denying yourself the opportunity to build the necessary grit that leads to confidence.
Dr. Brown explained the correlation between having the resilience to stick to your commitments and gaining confidence. “If you learn to honor your commitments and not see confidence as something outside of you, but a series of choices to actually cultivate something inside of you, then you will experience, I think, true confidence.”
Racing Louisville FC forward Emma Sears reacts to a missed goal during a game against Portland Thorns FC; Photo Credit: EM Dash
