Failure is Essential Training Camp
Michael Jordan was cut from his high school varsity team as a sophomore and relegated to the junior varsity team. Fortunately, this “failure” didn’t prevent what many people consider the greatest basketball player of all time from continuing to play the game. Unfortunately, many young people’s fear of failure is so strong that it prevents them from continuing to pursue doing things that they might have loved doing.
A research survey, commissioned by Procter & Gamble, found that the pressure to be perfect and the social perceptions of others contributed to a fear of failure that is especially prevalent among young ladies. The 2017 study found that during puberty, 50% of girls felt paralyzed by a fear of failure, 70% avoided trying new things because they were afraid to fail, 60% said that failing made them want to quit, and 80% reported that societal pressure to please others contributed to their fear of failure.
Make no mistake, fear of failure is not something that affects only young girls; it often prevents people of all ages from trying new things or sticking to the things that they are struggling with. Overcoming fear of failure is so important that GameChange dedicated an entire digital Training Camp to it. In the class, Dr. Michael Brown, a life & performance coach for CEOs across the nation, and Paul McDonald, a former All-American and NFL quarterback, both explain that failure is not something that should be avoided. In fact, they argue that failure is essential (hence, the title of the Training Camp).
Embracing Failure, Not Identity of Failure
Human beings are wired to run from danger, and so this might explain why we do our best to run away from and avoid failure. McDonald, who rose to the highest levels of football when he played quarterback in the NFL, offered advice that might seem counterintuitive. He urged us to resist the temptation to run from failure and instead to embrace it. He said, “Mistakes, failures, it’s all part of the sporting experience, so the whole key… is sort of embracing those moments, learning from them, but not having them overwhelm you.” Dr. Brown agreed. “I love the idea of actually taking a moment and studying your mistakes without being stuck in your mistakes.”
Although Dr. Brown believes that embracing your failures and learning from them is a key component to growth, he counsels against allowing yourself to believe that you are defined by your mistakes. He explained the difference in perspectives. “I am a failure versus I failed at this, or this was a mistake.”
No Failure, No Growth
There is a saying, “If you’re not failing, you’re not trying.” People who avoid pushing themselves to learn new things and grow have what is called a fixed mindset. Dr. Brown explained, “Fixed mindset is, ‘This is the way things are… and this is the way they always will be.’” Staying in the comfort zone of “this is the way things are” will inevitably lead to a mediocre life. The people who have had the most success and fulfillment in life are those who are willing to push themselves out of their comfort zone and risk failure.
Failing is an Opportunity to Grow
Dr. Brown has an interesting mantra for teams to consider after losing a game. He stated, “We use the term all the time in life and performance coaching among athletes professionally and collegiately that there’s no such thing as win or lose, (it’s) win or learn.” Learning from your failures is how you get better, and so elite athletes who have been able to get to the highest levels come to understand that they can view their failure as opportunities for growth.
McDonald explained how athletes can use their failures as fuel to get better. “Those are opportunities to maybe put a chip on your shoulder, peel the onion back, and really see more of the underlying motivation, why you do what you do and why you’re performing and why you’re playing, and why you’re in your sport. And it’s through those moments, you can actually elevate even higher through not just the learning and the growth, but it can also be further inspiration. Like, I’ll get this, I will get this.”
